An impending death ahead, her time has come to an end, but its not a 'natural' death. A murder has been committed. An abominable compilation of atrocities left this 'body' in a really bad shape. And there's only one suspect: Self-hate.
Underneath all that make-up and glam, a murder plan was being properly executed. But, truth be told, 'Self-hate' was only doing "the devil's job" on this victim-Literally!- 'cuz theres no other who could even think about commiting such merciless hate crime to such an innocent being. Many people are so afraid even listening to 'his' name, 'cuz he has been inmortalized as this 'red beast with horns hollding a trident'; in this case his name is "Self-esteem", along with his sidekick "Self-hate".
But the sttory doesnt begin here.........it all started with this gorgeous, happy, innocent girl who had her own battle with her mind.......exactly 'his' master plan, 'cuz thats 'his' battlefield-your mind-terefore, your heart.
However, she can be blamed as well, but now, looking at her and listening to her last cry for help its impossible(even cruel) to blame her for anything. But Im sure that deep inside, she knows that she had the 'cure' in her hands, there was SOMEONE there to fight her battles, she had The Lord by her side at all times, knocking at her door. But, like a respectful gentleman that He is, He wont enter into a place without being 'invited'.
But He was there, at all times....even now, when everything's crashing down, just waiting for her to 'let Him in'. But she wont, 'cuz she keeps listening to 'someone else'......just like she dis in the past........she doesnt want to carry on, she has embraced death as her redeemer, when her true Redeemer was right next to her, and I can feel His sadness, I cant see Him but the feling its so intense that I can feel it deeply into my heart.
Now, as I say good-bye to her, I watch the murder scene and the murderer giving 'his' finishing touches, watching 'his' epic masterpiece in this somber graveyard and all I can think its that the corpse inside that coffin could have been my own. Thankfully, Im still here, but now, the scene right in front of me-there's no reason to cheer about-as the pallbearers bury her coffin,one of them approaches me, since Im the only one that showed up and says: "I am really sorry miss, it is no intention to bother you whatsoever, but I have to know: what should we write on her epitaph?"...........And I looked at him and said: "Would you pay tribute to a murder?"-he stood there quietly.......
-"Exactly", I continued-"There's nothing to write on a piece of stone if that coffin its empty, 'cuz really, what's in there?. Only bones and fleash that would start to rotten really soon, so go ahead and bury it before it starts to stench"...............And I left, but, as I walked through the parking lot, I fell right on my knees begging God for forgiveness-not only for the words I said before-but for all the suffering that He went through because of me. But He had forgiven me a long time ago, I just needed to forgive myself, and I did, and I will be eternally grateful for having a second chance to make ammends in my life.
But the story doesnt end up here, as I pray, I hear a scream; its exactly what I thought, a loud, devilish shout, full of hate and angst; trying to start 'his' battele in my mind once again..but not this time; this time I choose to let SOMEONE GREATER than 'him' to fight my battles. I know that he wont rest-or hesitate-he will haunt tirelessly, but Im not afraid anymore, Im a survival, I have a purpose to continue, unlike this 'girl'(which name I wont mention), who gave up 'cuz her own strenght was not enough. But Im not fighting my enemy with my own strength..........thats why I stand victorious up to this day........and many more to come.......................
~ alex.
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